at times, kala mo love can keep you alive... but most of the time, love will kill you. not in the the physical sense, but it can really kill the person you are before you are with this person. i learned that too late...

coming in the 3rd year of being together, there's one thing that really broke my heart. "wala ng mahal ngaun..." hearing that kind of answer when asked why did you married the person you are with right now, it really broke me into pieces...

you see, i'm the kind of fighter who chooses her fights carefully. i decide if something is really worth fighting for or not... i thought my marriage was one of the worth fighting for... but after hearing all of these hurtful things coming from my own husband's mouth (or typing that is)... i came clear to me that marriage won't work if its only one-way...

i'm trying to make it work but every time my hubby is at work and is just chatting with me, he transforms into someone i had never known before... he suddenly becomes cold, selfish and arrogant... don't get me wrong, either don't blame my hormones for it...

i came to question myself today... what are you going to do about it? knowing that your husband is no longer in love with you? my answer... i don't know. i really don't. for the first time in my marriage, i felt like a little helpless child again... longing for the affection and care of the people around me...

i knew how it is like being pressured with work and all... i am working while taking care of my daughter and my unborn son... and to top it all up... i'm married to someone i don't even know right now...

tell me, is it wrong to tell the truth about why things are happening? is it right for a husband to get jealous over the little favors his partner is giving to her own family? is it wrong to hope that someday, he'll find it in his heart to believe that i love him for who he is, not for what he can provide?...

I'm 35 weeks and 6 days right now into my pregnancy... i have a heart condition that can endanger me in the time of giving birth... i want my child to be saved first before me... that's the way i want it to be...